I don’t have a lot to say these days that I’m not saying on the podcast… But let’s say some of it anyway. I think the fact that the podcast is up and running forces this blog to be a little more personal and/or serious, just so I’m not repeating myself. But we’ll see what happens. Anyway, I normally don’t like to do two random posts back to back, but it’s been weeks between, so…the first one’s long and serious…
- (I promise there are paragraph breaks in this entry. They’re hard to see on some devices though. Here’s one now.)
Like everybody, I’ve been shocked at the list of names coming out of the Hollywood sexual assault accusations. I’ve also been shocked at the amount of vehemence online toward situations on which we don’t have all of the details. I guess I shouldn’t be. I’ve had strong reactions to several of the names, too. But I do wish that as a people we sought to *prove* innocence or guilt rather than just believing it one way or the other. I remember seeing one post on Kevin Spacey that read, “has enough been done to bring him to justice?” And my first thought was, “To bring someone to justice…don’t there need to be charges filed?”
On the podcast, I went into detail about my anger and disappointment in hearing about Harvey Weinstein. I felt able to do that because he’d as much as admitted at least some of it. I feel the same about Cosby. I feel the same about Louie CK. Admissions of guilt/wrongdoing go a long way when there’s otherwise a lack of evidence.
It’s hard to prove something from decades ago. Sometimes it’s hard to prove something even just from a few DAYS ago. Lack of proof, of course, doesn’t mean nothing happened…but when you hear someone accusing George Takei of sexual assault 40 years ago and George Takei denying it…who do you believe? And why? I don’t know either guy…what dog do I have in the fight, man? I just like Star Trek.
It’s a sad time in Hollywood, made sadder by the fact that for probably every ten or twenty legitimate claims, there’s going to be somebody who isn’t telling the truth, too. As sickening as it is to think about, false accusations do happen. (Just ask Craig Charles, who plays Lister on Red Dwarf. Or Brian Banks from the Atlanta Falcons. Or several others that aren’t hard to find with a vague Google search. Even Pete Townshend has a mark on his record that’s basically bullshit.)
I’m deeply troubled by the accusations coming out. I’m deeply troubled that many of the victims are and historically have been disregarded out of hand just because we like the celebrity in question. But I’m also deeply concerned about the potential for false accusation to be believed out of hand, too. We should demand justice, absolutely. We should also demand evidence, corroboration, admission, or at least some damn good details before we ruin someone’s life. But we’ve become a society where the whole of our thoughts fit into 140 characters on twitter…so much so that we angrily complained when they increased the limit to 280. We yell, we don’t ask.
Nevertheless, the good news is that some very bad people are being caught very literally with their pants down. And I’m for that.
- Told you the first one was long. The rest are shorter. I’m still dealing with dental work. Went to my regular dentist last week to look into some pain I’ve been having in a front tooth and he didn’t find anything worth fixing. So that was a waste of insurance money…but at least it was good news, I guess. Bad news is the oral surgeon is going to cost an arm and a leg. I’m trying to get it pushed back to January so my deductible will reset before I go in. So far, the two times I’ve tried calling they’ve already been closed for the day and talking to an answering service is roughly the same as standing on my front porch and shouting the message… So here’s hoping to get someone on the phone next week…
- The migraines have lessened following the first tooth extraction. But they’re not gone. I was having them weekly. Now it’s been a couple/few weeks and I just finally had one on Friday night. But that was a night at the end of a very long, very stressful week that ended with me missing lunch on Friday then going to a wedding reception with a DJ who used non-stop strobing lights. So there was a lot going on there. And even then, the impact was less than it had been with previous migraines. So I choose to view that as progress.
- Why can you only find chicken like the kind you get at wedding receptions at wedding receptions? It’s delicious. Yet I have no idea how they do it, where to get it, or what the hell. All I want is tasty chicken.
- Thanksgiving is soon. It’s been weird the last couple of years. Over the past several decades, my brother and I (and as the years passed, the rest of his family) have gone to see my mother’s side of the family for a big dinner in Cape Girardeau, MO. The last couple of years (including this one) there have been cancelations of the event and we’ve had to figure out other things to do. This year it makes a lot of sense to cancel as one of the people who’s been at the heart of putting it together for my whole lifetime is facing down some serious medical issues. Last year it was also canceled for reasons that are a little less clear to me, but I’m sure are solid to somebody. Left scrambling, last year I went over to Dave and Valerie’s place and we had dinner. This year, with a bit more time to scramble, we’re doing the same, but Dad and Susan are coming over too, so it’ll feel a little bigger. It’s weird seeing a lifelong tradition starting to fall away. But I’m looking forward to a good day this year. It’s my favorite holiday.
- Christmas is just around the corner too, huh? I normally make the first draft of my Christmas list on Halloween–a tradition I think I got from South Park several years ago. I’m behind this year. I’ve bought a lot of the stuff I wanted already, so it might be a lighter list. But that’s actually cool with me. In the past several years at Christmas I’ve actually had more fun going over to Susan’s and eating the food and watching the kids open stuff. Which is really how that should be. But, wow…it feels like I just stopped thinking about Christmas from last year!
- It dawns on me now that moving the oral surgery to January is probably a good idea because of all of the holiday eating, too, huh?
- I haven’t done a damn bit of work on my next album since I last mentioned it. Just been a mix of lazy and worried about my health. Just need to do it. 2018 will be here before I know it, and I’d really like to put out the record in the Spring. It’s going to be a good one. I’m very happy with the music. I just need to put words on it. And then get some photos taken, if I plan on it having any kind of cover…
- Oh! I went to a Halloween party, by the way! A friend threw a party and I knew a couple of people who were going, so I went. I spent a lot of the night sitting by a fire he built in his backyard. Which was actually kind of funny, because at one point everyone else had wandered back inside the house except for me…so to the casual, late-arriving observer it might’ve looked like I got bored of the party and wandered off to start a fire in the backyard. (I wouldn’t put it past me. I once got bored at a party and took a bottle of wine into the bathroom, ran a bath, and got in for a bit. Using their towels was probably a little violating…but it went from being a bad party to “remember that time when Derek took a bath at our party?”) Anyway… It was a fun party and I met some nice people. So that’s good.
- In other news, I’ll be playing bass with the Feldman Group again on the Saturday after Thanksgiving (Nov 25). I’ll try to post details when it’s a little closer…watch my Facebook page. It’s a place near my house, but I don’t remember the name. It’s almost useless that I’m writing this…
I think that’s it. Hope it was something.
- A lot of Leonard Cohen, lately. The 1-year anniversary of his death was last week and I got to thinking about him.
- Also a lot of Rollins Band. Because my tastes are inconsistent.