Something a Little More Fun

Last night’s post got intense.  So here’s what I think should happen in Star Wars Episodes 7-9.

Okay.  Think back to the first Star Wars movie.  No.  Not Episode I.  The ORIGINAL Star Wars.  Before we cared about it being A New Hope or any of that.  What’s the very first thing ANY of us knew about Star Wars?  The very FIRST image of it you have in your head?  I’ll answer for you…

“…a long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.”

That’s an iconic phrase.  In one not-quite complete sentence, you’re immediately dialed into the universe and you know that what’s coming is an hour and a half of great news.  Except…wait a minute…  You know what you’ve never noticed about that phrase?  It’s “A LONG, LONG TIME AGO.”  Star Wars isn’t in the future.  It’s in the past.  It’s just also “far, far away.”  So it’s a distant past none of us knows anything about.  It explains a lot…like why they’re playing outer-space ragtime in the cantina scene (a speakeasy).  Star Wars is the past.  It’s…it’s history…

So here’s what I want.

I want the next three movies to continue chronicling the so-named Star Wars.  It gets rough, but New Luke (I don’t know the character’s name yet–but he’s New Luke and you know it) survives.  He’s the only one who does, and he does what anyone who loses everyone he loved does.  He runs.  He runs far, far away.  It takes a long, long time.  And when he lands on some distant planet, he has historical documents, chronicling the Star Wars–the history of his people.  And he stumbles out of his space craft, finding himself somewhere familiar, yet foreign to him.  He moves toward a group set up with bright lights.  The sign on the building reads “Mel’s Drive-In.” What is a Drive-In??? New Luke walks forward and sees a man with a camera.  He looks like he’s filming history…and…boy, Bob Falfa looks familiar somehow…

New Luke walks up to the man with the camera.  He’s clearly running the show.  New Luke can TELL he is important.  Everyone listens to him–they even do what he says.  “Please, sir…  I’ve come from far, far away.  My people have been through much.  Someone needs to tell our story…please take this chronicle of the Star Wars.  Tell the others.  People HAVE to know.”

“Okay kid.  I’ll read your script.”

The year is 1973.  And George Lucas is making American Graffiti.


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