So anyone who’s been paying attention on the blog (and/or Facebook) lately probably knows that I’m a big fan of “Deadliest Catch.” Well, a few of the Captains from that show (Sig Hansen and the Hillstrand Brothers) are doing a tour of theatres and whatnot in what I imagine started out as an attempt at a tax write-off that became a good idea. They’re coming to St. Louis and I’ve got my ticket. (I’m very excited!) From what I hear, there’s a Q&A section to the show, where fans/audience members can ask questions of the guys and presumably get sworn at a lot. (I bet every night there’s some jackass that asks, “So how do I get on the show? Durrrrr!” And then, hopefully, the Captains mock him until he cries.)
I’ve been thinking about it for a few days, and I’ve realized that I have absolutely nothing to ask those guys. I know everything I want to know about the show and how they do their jobs. A lot of it is either self-explanatory or is explained in detail throughout the series. The only thing I could possibly do is ask them something entirely unrelated to the show and/or fishing…or something semi-related that is completely stupid, pointless, and/or insulting.
So… Following is a list of questions I could ask…but won’t.
- So Sig… What do you think it would be like to have bananas for arms?
- If you could be half-man/half-fish, which way around would you have it, and why?
- Who’s your favorite Captain from the show…Kirk or Picard?
- Pepsi or Coke?
- A series of true-or-false questions…
- Heads or tails? Call it in the air…
- So how big is a 30-foot wave?
- What’s your favorite Pink Floyd record?
- Is there any…y’know…particular…race or ethnicity that you hate?
- So a bunch of dudes living together on a boat. Kinda gay, ain’t it?
- Ever seen Sid & Nancy? Thoughts?
- What would you do for a Klondike Bar and why should I care?
- I’m going to the bar, can I get you guys anything?
- So didja have a good Easter?
- You guys wanna cut a record after we’re done here?
Seriously though… I have enormous respect for what these guys do and I could never do it myself (largely because I have an almost paralyzing fear of large bodies of water—it’s actually kind of surprising that I watch the show, the fear is so bad). I think that’s what’s tripping me up. I like the show and those guys enough that I’ve kinda already done my research. I’m sure I’ll be entertained by whatever they have to say that night…but I don’t think I have any questions I’ve been wanting to ask that I haven’t found answers to elsewhere.
Oh well…it’ll be fun anyway. Suggest a question for me, if you’ve got one.