Just an FYI

I’m not trying to be morbid in saying what I’m about to say.  But let’s dive in.

 

One of these days, I’m going to die (God forbid!).  I think about death a lot—though probably no more than anyone else…but I do probably admit to it more than a lot of people.  You need only to run through the track lists on my records to see that it’s a recurring thought for me.  Of the 39 songs I’ve released (Wow! I didn’t realize it was that many!), I would consider 23 of them to be about death—or at least to reference it.  That’s not to say that I think about my own mortality all the time, but it does pop into mind now and again.

 

And that brings us to this.  I’ve posted this on Facebook, and it’s something I’ve mentioned in an upcoming chapter of the “Restless” autobiography I’ve been working on (no, I haven’t forgotten about that!).  People have lots of euphemisms for death, most of which I don’t care for.  I much prefer to just say that someone died…but people insist on calling it something less abrasive.  Christians will often say that the departed “went home.”  Most people have found themselves at some point using the phrase “passed away” or “passed on.”  People also seem to frequently say they “lost” somebody (which I find particularly puzzling, because if you lost someone, surely you must be able to FIND them again, right?)

 

Well…I don’t want anyone to struggle for a phrase when I die—which, if I don’t get to a dentist soon, might be this week (God forbid!).  When I die, there is only ONE euphemism I will allow (err…”would” allow, if I were there to enforce it…).  I would very much appreciate it if people didn’t refer to me as having “gone home.”  I don’t want people to think of me dying as a “loss.”  I certainly don’t want to “pass on” (as that just sounds somehow toilet related).

 

When I die—not that I’m planning on it anytime soon, God forbid!—please just refer to me as “defunct.”

 

Thanks.