Okay…let’s tackle all of the celebrity news that I’ve been wanting to talk about…
- Kanye West — Never bought one of his records. Never will. Has nothing to do with his “antics.” It has to do with being a music fan and him not producing any of it…but yeah…total dumbshit (as my mother would say).
- Beyonce — Much more classy than I thought. Don’t own any of her records either.
- Taylor Swift — Deserves better. Not better treatment, exactly…just…better than eMpTyV.
- Patrick Swayze — I still believe that NO ONE puts Baby in the corner. See ya’ in the pictures, Swayze. The Summer of Death sucks… WOLVERINES!!!
- The guys who used to be in Nirvana who aren’t dead threw a hissy-fit about Kurt Cobain’s image being “unlockable” in the new edition of “Guitar-Band-Heroic-Rock-Whatever” or whatever… In part, they said: “…we are dismayed and very disappointed in the way a facsimile of Kurt is used in the Guitar Hero game.” “We urge Activision to do the right thing in re-locking Kurt’s character so that this won’t continue in the future.” “It’s hard to watch an image of Kurt pantomiming other artists’ music alongside cartoon characters. Kurt Cobain wrote songs that hold a lot of meaning to people all over the world. We feel he deserves better.” Which, to me, implies that Dave Grohl and—uhh—the one that isn’t famous anymore…think that the other artists like Bon Jovi, et al DIDN’T write songs that hold a lot of meaning for people all over the world…and I think that those guys might deserve better than a drug-addict, burnout, tone-deaf, coward-who-killed-himself singing THEIR songs. But maybe that’s just me.
- Jay Leno — Why does this hump have a new show? Are they just trying to completely rape Conan’s ratings? …don’t want the Irish-kid to make good? Boo, Jay Leno. Boo.
- Patsy Kensit — Forgot about her, didn’t ya?
- Just heard where Harrison Ford wants to make a FIFTH “Indiana Jones” movie. After the “Indiana Jones and the Search for Spock” fiasco, I’d settle for a FOURTH one, thanks Harry.
- A Michael Jackson tribute concert in Vienna (organized by Jermaine Jackson) was cancelled because of a “lack of interest” among artists to commit to perform. So pretty much, performing artists finally caught up with me on that one.
- Re: The guy that started yellin’ at Obama. This kind of thing happens all the time in other countries. In fact, in most other nations it’s expected if not encouraged…but in Washington DC, you’re still a jackass… Don’t be a Kanye. Be a Beyonce.
…and that’s what I think of the celebrities in the news.