As I said earlier, I’ve accomplished nothing this week. The closest I’ve come to getting any work done is that I’m now fully up to speed on “House” and “How I Met Your Mother.” Plus, I’ve eaten a lot. In fact, when I’m done with this post, I’m going to the 24-hour McDonalds and ordering a burger (although last time I was there, they were closed…how does that happen at a 24 hour McDonalds?).
So…that leads me to updating you on the attempt to lose weight that I started a couple of months ago. I’ve been bouncing around between 195-210 ever since…which pretty much means nothing’s changed. Of course, if I exercised, did anything physical, or even walked more than 10 feet to any given doorway/location, maybe I’d have something more to show. However I’ve got to say, all things considered, I think doing absolutely NOTHING and staying in the same approximate weight-class is pretty impressive.
Nonetheless, I’d still like to get back down to the 185 I was a couple of years ago… Get a few more of my shirts fitting right again. Be less winded when I go up a set of stairs. I’d make it my New Year’s resolution, but I think those are only for idiots and people pretending they’re not idiots. So I’m not doing that…but I’m still thinking about it. I’m still going to try to try to TRY to do something about it.
…so there’s your update.
…and here’s your George W. Bush Picture of the Day (16 days remaining in term):
This one actually is a little bit mean, but I promise that it’s a real shot and neither I nor anyone else has done anything to make him look any more evil than he did on that day. I just couldn’t avoid posting this one. This whole thing’s supposed to be in good-cheer…but I do genuinely despise the man…and this picture HAD to make the list…just somehow defines the man for me.
I’ve seen every Mel Brooks movie except “The Twelve Chairs.” I love everything I’ve seen, to varying degrees. I mean, “High Anxiety” isn’t as high on my list as “Blazing Saddles…” But it’s still good. I even liked “Life Stinks,” which most people not only didn’t see, but didn’t even hear about since it disappeared pretty much overnight.
Watching Mel’s movies, you can learn a lot. Here’s a list of some of the stuff I’ve learned…some of it’s funny and some of it isn’t. Dunno why I’m going to 14…but here we go…
- To strip something of its power, you must laugh at it. Mel did this with Hitler. He made Hitler into the biggest joke of all time. Hitler isn’t scary to me…he’s a character in a Mel Brooks movie. He’s a joke now, and Mel’s to thank for that. He also did that with Frankenstein’s monster…but Peter Boyle still scares the hell out of me. (To Be or Not to Be, Young Frankenstein)
- Gene Wilder is a genius. (Blazing Saddles, The (Original) Producers)
- Your condition isn’t serious unless those two muscles on the back of your neck are standing up (he called them your “elevens”). (Life Stinks)
- It’s only okay to say the n-word if you’re making fun of the RACIST, but not if you’re making fun of the race. And it’s probably best if a black guy writes it for you (see Pryor, Richard). (Blazing Saddles)
- “Schmuck” is a great and underused word. (He has a campaign going to preserve “schmuck.” There’s probably a website for it somewhere, but you can Google it yourself.)
- In the Holocaust, the Jews wore gold stars — we all know that…but the homosexuals were also forced to wear a form of branding…a pink triangle. (“To Be or Not to Be”)
- It’s good to be the king. (History of the World, Part 1)
- Alex Karras can punch out a horse. (Blazing Saddles)
- A guy getting hit in the crotch…always funny. (Various)
- “Robin Hood: Men in Tights” was the first time I ever heard of the concept of a chastity belt.
- It’s hard to breathe if you’re wearing a helmet. (Spaceballs)
- Douglas Fairbanks had tiny feet. (Blazing Saddles)
- Alfred Hitchcock parodies? They don’t hold up very well. (High Anxiety)
- If you’ve got it…flaunt it. (The Producers)
So there you go. I owe a lot to Mel Brooks…but a part of me will never forgive him for unleashing Bill Pullman on the world.
George W. Bush Picture of the Day (17 days remaining in term):
I can’t believe it’s the end of the week already. I forgot how quickly time flies when you don’t have to work!
The bummer is that I got approximately NONE of my to-do list done. The good thing, though, is that I’m bored. That means I’ll go back to work on Monday and put in a full day, then maybe even have some energy left over to do something on the presently abandoned to-do list. But…that quickly comes around to being bad again, since I’ll wear myself out by Wednesday, and I’ll be ready for another vacation by Friday.
The circle of life goes on.
In other news, I just watched three episodes of the current season of House. I’m trying to catch up by Monday, because House just moved to Monday nights and that means I can start watching it on time again. This is probably the first time in a year or more that I’ve been able to do that. I’m kind of excited…but I’ll also be remarkably snarky for the next few days, as happens when I OD on House.
…there’s that circle thing again.
And here’s you George W. Bush Picture of the day (18 days remaining in term):
I can’t top yesterday’s…but I think this one’s pretty good, too.
Okay…so you’re all aware that I’ve been working on a record for about two years called “Out from the Light.” It’s ready. Just had to wait until after Christmas to get the extra money. So it’ll “drop” (or whatever) in the early part of 2009.
I’ve blogged and written for my website extensively on the record (though I’m not sure how much of that has hit the net yet…apparently it’s a new year’s resolution of mine to do something with the damn website in ’09). But I’ve kind of kept a lid on “disk two” of the thing. It’s a separate entity, but it’s being lumped in with the rest of the record. Its individual title is “Departure,” but it’s kind of “Out from the Light 2.” It continues on the theme of dark topics and personal reflection…mostly it’s just a bunch of stuff I wanted to get out there before devoting all of my (writing) time to Blue Tattoo. It’s kind of schizophrenic (quadrophenic?) and varied in musical style. Doesn’t really make sense as a linear record and it’s unusual in a lot of ways when balanced against the rest of my solo work (or at least the stuff that’s made it onto records)…hence the title of the thing.
I’m also playing everything myself. Guitars, bass, drums…whatever. I’m playing it all. Hopefully it won’t suck… I’m not really thinking of it as a “record.” More of a bunch of what I call “treated demos” which is what I call my demos that include more than just me playing an acoustic and singing. (I do that mostly to give other musicians I may work with a blueprint of what’s in my head as I’m writing it.) I’m taking it a little further, though. Usually my “treated demos” just add a shaker, tambourine, and/or second guitar. In the case of “Departure,” though, I’m making them a little more “final” adding full drum tracks, bass, electrics, etc. to make it more “full” sounding.
…so that’ll be your free CDR if you buy the new one…which is hopefully coming by the end of the month. And…surprize! It’ll include a cover version of Roxy Music’s “Mother of Pearl.” Hope the two of you who know that song are excited! 🙂
That’s it. It’s 12:17. Happy New Year. Hope you did more than I did…or at least had better wine. 🙂
The George W. Bush Picture of the Day (19 days remaining in term):
“Happy New………what the hell is going on here?!?!?”
Note: In my opinion, that’s probably the funniest one. I just couldn’t hold it off any longer. 🙂