Revisiting the 1990s…again…

I’ve been in a 1990s mood.

As usual, I mean. In general, that’s my overall aesthetic.

But also I’ve been listening to a lot of 90s music. It started (as it might) with the 30th anniversary of Pearl Jam’s first album “Ten.” I listened to the album in full and wanted to keep walking around in the music of my high-school parking lot, as it were. Especially upon realizing that 30 years of Pearl Jam’s first record also means it’s 30 years of PEARL JAM, and of Grunge, and all the music that was so important to me in my teen-years.

In the past I’ve made 90s themed playlists full of songs I liked from the era. And they’ve been fine. But the linked post is from 2012. It’s been nine years since the last time I did this…and I’ve bought a LOT of music since then. I wanted to do something a bit more authoritative as a master-list of everything I could remember even kind of liking (alongside some stuff that came out in the 90s, but I was late to the party and came to like later). So that’s why we’re here. I’ve now got a playlist on my phone of 214 songs from the 1990s, and I’m going to subject you to it. Some might find it interesting. Others have already closed their browser. Either is a correct response.

A few caveats, of course. Yes. Obviously I forgot to put your favorite song on here. Sorry about that. Also I know there’s not a lot of rap/hip-hop/R&B. Just never really got too deeply into that stuff–I’m mostly a rock guy who occasionally branches out into pop or folk or stuff that kinda logically spins off of my primary interests. I like what I like and I don’t like what I don’t like. If it helps anybody who likes rap, I also remain a hard-pass on Marilyn Manson to this day.

Also I avoided a few songs/artists that probably BELONG on the list but which I just can’t make myself listen to for one reason or another. Like… I don’t need to hear Cher’s “Believe” ever again in my life. Nor do I need to hear any DC Talk, Audio Adrenaline, Newsboys, or any of the other Christian rock that I was into at the time…although I did still include that Jars of Clay song. I’m not sure where the line is for me on that. (But for what it’s worth, all those Christian CDs are still on my shelf, mostly to remind me that we all make mistakes.) Some bands are represented with one song. Some with many. It’s all a reflection of MY TASTE, which isn’t necessarily a fair metric.

The order of the list is bananas. I didn’t choose the order myself. I’d have probably tried to at least lump stuff together by genre. However instead of putting in that kind of work on 214 songs, I just dumped them all into a playlist and told my player to shuffle them. And this is what it came up with. I gain and lose indie cred about every third song. It’s a trip, man…

So enough preface…check this out. And then yell at me about what I skipped. (More thoughts on the 90s follow the list.)

  1. Ironic – Alanis Morissette
  2. Right Now – Van Halen
  3. Kiss Me – Sixpence None the Richer
  4. Jagged – Old 97s
  5. Elderly Woman Behind the Counter in a Small Town – Pear Jam
  6. Dream All Day – The Posies
  7. Hey Jealousy – Gin Blossoms
  8. One of Us – Joan Osbourne
  9. Leaving Las Vegas – Sheryl Crow
  10. One – U2
  11. Misery – Soul Asylum
  12. Learn to Fly – Foo Fighters
  13. Big Fungus – Michael Manring
  14. No Scrubs – TLC
  15. Strong Enough – Sheryl Crow
  16. November Rain – Guns N’ Roses
  17. This Kiss – Faith Hill
  18. Stick it Out – Rush
  19. Mr. Jones – Counting Crows
  20. Come As You Are – Nirvana
  21. Sober – Tool
  22. Two Princes – Spin Doctors
  23. Sex Type Thing – Stone Temple Pilots
  24. Lovefool – The Cardigans
  25. Everyday is a Winding Road – Sheryl Crow
  26. Basket Case – Green Day
  27. Wynona’s Big Brown Beaver – Primus
  28. Alive – Pearl Jam
  29. Untouchable Face – Ani DiFranco
  30. MMMBop – Hanson (Shut up–it gets worse!)
  31. Buddy Holly – Weezer
  32. The Calling – Yes
  33. I’m the One – Descendents
  34. Wonderwall – Oasis
  35. I’ll Make Love to You – Boyz II Men
  36. Vision of Love – Mariah Carey
  37. Say You’ll Be There – Spice Girls
  38. Come to My Window – Melissa Ethridge
  39. Jeremy – Pearl Jam
  40. Hoover Dam – Sugar
  41. Shine – Collective Soul
  42. Grace, Too – The Tragically Hip
  43. One Week – Barenaked Ladies (See? Told you it got worse.)
  44. When I Come Around – Green Day
  45. Beautiful Stranger – Madonna
  46. Bitch – Meredith Brooks
  47. Loser – Beck
  48. All Star – Smash Mouth (…and worse!)
  49. Peruvian Skies – Dream Theater
  50. Vogue – Madonna
  51. Linger – The Cranberries
  52. Supersatellite – Our Lady Peace
  53. My Hero – Foo Fighters
  54. Interstate Love Song – Stone Temple Pilots
  55. Good Riddance – Green Day
  56. Semi-Charmed Life – Third Eye Blind
  57. My Name is Mud – Primus
  58. Spoonman – Soundgarden
  59. Evangeline – Matthew Sweet
  60. All I Wanna Do – Sheryl Crow
  61. I Will Remember You – Sarah McLachlan
  62. Lightning Crashes – Live
  63. Black – Pearl Jam
  64. Can’t Even Tell – Soul Asylum
  65. Gangsta’s Paradise – Coolio
  66. Creep – Radiohead
  67. Peaches – The Presidents of the United States of America
  68. Zombie – The Cranberries
  69. Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door – Guns N’ Roses
  70. Under the Bridge – Red Hot Chili Peppers
  71. The Show Must Go On – Queen
  72. Pieces of You – Jewel
  73. Cannonball – The Breeders
  74. Come Out and Play – The Offspring
  75. Lake of Fire – Meat Puppets
  76. I Will Always Love You – Whitney Houston
  77. Ode to My Family – The Cranberries
  78. Trippin’ on a Hole in a Paper Heart – Stone Temple Pilots
  79. Are You Gonna Go My Way – Lenny Kravitz
  80. Like a Friend – Pulp
  81. Sad But True – Metallica
  82. She Loves Me – Descendents
  83. Still Remains – Stone Temple Pilots
  84. No Rain – Blind Melon
  85. Flood – Jars of Clay
  86. Smells Like Teen Spirit – Nirvana
  87. Brick – Ben Folds Five
  88. So It Goes – Spoondrift (A local band with whom I was friends…they pop up some more)
  89. Iris – Goo Goo Dolls
  90. It’s a Wonderful Lie – Paul Westerberg
  91. If It Makes You Happy – Sheryl Crow
  92. Saturday Night Divas – Spice Girls
  93. Let’s Get Rocked – Def Leppard
  94. More Than Words – Extreme
  95. Been Caught Stealing – Jane’s Addiction
  96. Today – Smashing Pumpkins
  97. Angel – Sarah McLachlan
  98. Bored of You – The Pursuit of Happiness
  99. Paled – Spoondrift
  100. Big Bang Baby – Stone Temple Pilots
  101. Windfall – Son Volt
  102. I Alone – Live
  103. Stay (I Missed You) – Lisa Loeb
  104. The River of Dreams – Billy Joel
  105. Kiss from a Rose – Seal
  106. Pull Me Under – Dream Theater
  107. Don’t Tell Me What Love Can Do – Van Halen
  108. Animal – Pearl Jam
  109. I Don’t Want to Wait – Paula Cole
  110. Undone (The Sweater Song) – Weezer
  111. Man in the Box – Alice in Chains
  112. Lie – Dream Theater
  113. Hand in My Pocket – Alanis Morissette
  114. Right Here Right Now – Jesus Jones
  115. Cornflake Girl – Tori Amos
  116. The Unforgiven – Metallica
  117. Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover – Sophie B. Hawkins
  118. Corduroy – Pearl Jam
  119. All Apologies – Nirvana
  120. Mysterious Ways – U2
  121. Firestarter – The Prodigy
  122. Run-Around – Blues Traveler
  123. Tubthumping – Chumbawamba
  124. I’d Do Anything for Love (But I Won’t Do That) – Meat Loaf
  125. Liar – Rollins Band
  126. Hurt – Nine in Nails
  127. Silent Lucidity – Queensryche
  128. Give it Away – Red Hot Chili Peppers
  129. 2 Become 1 – Spice Girls
  130. Given to Fly – Pearl Jam
  131. If I Ever Lose My Faith in You – Sting
  132. Home – Dream Theater
  133. You Oughta Know – Alanis Morissette
  134. When I Get Old – Descendents
  135. Here & Now – Letters to Cleo
  136. You Were Meant for Me – Jewel
  137. All Over You – Live
  138. The Good in Everyone – Sloan
  139. High Enough – Damn Yankees
  140. Enter Sandman – Metallica
  141. Mrs. Robinson – The Lemonheads
  142. Breakfast at Tiffany’s – Deep Blue Something
  143. The Act We Act – Sugar
  144. That Don’t Impress Me Much – Shania Twain
  145. Money City Maniacs – Sloan
  146. Fell on Black Days – Soundgarden
  147. Losing My Religion – REM
  148. Sabotage – Beastie Boys
  149. Viva Forever – Spice Girls
  150. Even Better Than the Real Thing – U2
  151. Lit Up – Buckcherry
  152. As I Lay Me Down – Sophie B. Hawkins
  153. Wishlist – Pearl Jam
  154. I’ll Be There for You (Theme from Friends) – The Rembrandts
  155. Can You Feel the Love Tonight? – Elton John
  156. Livin’ on the Edge – Aerosmith
  157. Criminal – Fiona Apple
  158. To Be with You – Mr. Big
  159. Waterfalls – TLC
  160. Cryin’ – Aerosmith
  161. Closer – Nine Inch Nails
  162. Hole Hearted – Extreme
  163. Nothing Compares 2U – Sinead O’Connor
  164. Bulls on Parade – Rage Against the Machine
  165. Head Like a Hole – Nine Inch Nails
  166. One Night – Spoondrift
  167. Courage – The Tragically Hip
  168. Run to the Water – Live
  169. Longview – Green Day
  170. Jerry Was a Race Car Driver – Primus
  171. Wannabe – Spice Girls
  172. Yellow Ledbetter – Pearl Jam
  173. I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles) – The Proclaimers
  174. Rusty Cage – Soundgarden
  175. Spice Up your Life – Spice Girls
  176. Not for You – Pearl Jam
  177. Heart-Shaped Box – Nirvana
  178. Friday I’m in Love – The Cure
  179. Green-Tinted Sixties Mind – Mr. Big
  180. Lonely Holiday – Old 97s
  181. Common People – Pulp
  182. Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong – Spin Doctors
  183. Push – Matchbox Twenty
  184. The Dolphin’s Cry – Live
  185. Killing in the Name – Rage Against the Machine
  186. Set the Twilight Reeling – Lou Reed
  187. Vasoline – Stone Temple Pilots
  188. Only Wanna Be with You – Hootie & the Blowfish
  189. What’s Up? – 4 Non-Blondes
  190. Hold on Hope – Guided by Voices
  191. Sunny Came Home – Shawn Colvin
  192. Emotions – Mariah Carey
  193. How Do I Live – LeAnn Rimes
  194. Hold My Hand – Hootie & the Blowfish
  195. Sometimes – Spoondrify
  196. Remedy – The Black Crowes
  197. 3 am – Matchbox Twenty
  198. Nothing Else Matters – Metallica
  199. Little White Lie – Sammy Hagar
  200. Life is a Highway – Tom Cochrane
  201. When the Ship Went Down – Spoondrift
  202. Hold On – Wilson Phillips
  203. Song #2 – Blur
  204. Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm – Crash Test Dummies
  205. Better Man – Pearl Jam
  206. Blaze of Glory – Jon Bon Jovi (solo, for some reason)
  207. Du Hast – Rammstein
  208. Monkey Wrench – Foo Fighters
  209. Plush – Stone Temple Pilots
  210. Who Will Save Your Soul – Jewel
  211. Black Hole Sun – Soundgarden
  212. Runaway Train – Soul Asylum
  213. Hunger Strike – Temple of the Dog
  214. Baby, Baby – Amy Grant

Again, before you shout, “Who the fuck would end a playlist with ‘Baby, Baby’ by Amy Grant?” remember that the phone sorted the songs for me. I’d maybe drop that one somewhere in the first third and then be content with it ending on “Hunger Strike” but I didn’t make the decisions on this one. And even though there is nothing stopping me from fixing it, that would seem contrary to the point of pressing “shuffle.”

The 90s were a weird time and somewhat divided into tribes, musically. Those of us who listened to a little of everything never really knew how to dress. Personally I opted for jeans and a t-shirt, usually with an over-shirt on top–flannel preferred. Which I guess made me one of the Grunge kids…but I was also super into Dream Theater and Mr. Big and the Spice Girls. So I don’t know.

I still dress like that, by the way. Someone I know recently went to a 90s themed event and wanted to dress in 90s clothes…from the stuff they listed they ended up much more 80s, in my opinion (IOU sweatshirt, fanny pack, etc…). I advised that they just show up in jeans and a t-shirt, because that’s how I experienced the 90s. And the 00s. And the 10s. And the 20s, so far. I’d like to think that look is at least somewhat timeless.

The 90s were difficult for me on many levels, but they’re also the time I’d go back to if I had the chance. I’m not sure if I’d make any changes if I had it to do again. Maybe I’d have chased after some of the girls that might’ve given me the time of day instead of the ones I did. And I’d have been less of a dick about leaving the band I was in at the time. But we’ve all got those stories in one way or another. I do know I’d still listen to most of the same music. Maybe more of it, given how much stuff I’ve picked up after the 90s ended. And it’d still be loud.

I hope we share that, anyway.

————

Current Listening: …you’re kidding, right?

“No! That’s German for The Bart, The.” – Sideshow Bob

I realized I can still just google “Random Simpsons Quotes” and land on good quotes for posts like these. So I’m doing that now. But I stand by being irritated that my old source is gone, I still assume it’s because of Disney, and I still advocate fucking Mickey in the neck. Anyway, here’s a random post.

  1. Some things fell my way financially since my last post. I won’t get specific, but I feel like I can breathe again. Some other stuff’s still wrong, but I’m trying to count my blessings. (One. One blessing. *Thunder* Ah-ha-ha!)
  2. I’ve been enjoying the Olympics this week. As many of you know I’m generally anti-sports, but I do love the Olympics. (I follow Team USA’s Twitter feed year-round.) I guess every 2-4 years is how often I’m able to care about sports. Damn shame about what’s going on with Simone Biles, but she’s unquestionably doing the right thing. And as much of an inspiration as she could be by winning a bunch of medals, she’s an even BIGGER example and inspiration for everybody (but especially young people) to do the right thing for your health. She went from being a hero in the sport to being a hero to everybody. Bless her.
  3. I’ve been slowly working my way through the movies of Wes Anderson. I hadn’t seen any, but had bought a copy of Grand Budapest Hotel on BluRay as soon as it hit the Criterion Collection last year on the recommendation of a good friend. Finally watched it, loved it, and got hungry for more. So far I’ve watched that one, Rushmore, The Royal Tenenbaums, The Darjeeling Limited, and Moonrise Kingdom. My favorite right now is still Grand Budapest Hotel, but I think Moonrise Kingdom might be a close second. I’m a little surprised by that because I don’t really like Bruce Willis…which…don’t get me wrong, he’s VERY good at being Bruce Willis. But he tends to make movies that aren’t my cup of tea and I don’t think I’d have a lot to say to him in a bar… But that was a good movie, with Willis used sparingly. And it was fun and funny, as is most of Anderson’s stuff. I’ve been enjoying this journey. There are 4 more to go, not counting the one he just debuted at Cannes last week. I’m saving The Life Aquatic for last…because I’m told that has a lot of Bowie songs in it and I bet I’m going to love that.
  4. I was very sad to hear that Dusty Hill died. I’ve never been the biggest ZZ Top fan, but I always appreciated him as a bass player. He was just ROCK SOLID as a player and seemed like a really good guy. I got to see ZZ Top for the first time in 2019, and they put on a good show despite a bad sound mix. As a bar-band veteran myself, I’ve probably played 99% of their hits to sloppy drunks over the years. I carry a lot of good memories of playing those songs. I’m (mostly) sure I haven’t played my last one.
  5. One of the benefits of having my new car is something that is in some ways also a detriment. For the past several years I’ve been driving a V6 engine, but the new car is a 4-cylinder. That means it’s a little (lot) more sluggish. Imagine that you go to a coworker and say, “Hey could you help me with something?” If your coworker jumps right up and says, “Sure!” that’s a V6. But if they say, “Yeah, just let me finish what I’m working on first and I’ll be glad to help out…” That’s a 4 Cylinder. You’ll get the filing cabinet moved, sure…but it’ll be a minute. There are some times I feel like I don’t have enough car underneath me in the new vehicle… But… It means I also can’t drive as much like a dick anymore. I’ve got to let some shit go on the highway and know I can’t outrun the other assholes. In many ways that’s a good thing… That’s what I’m telling myself…
  6. I go through phases of which guitar I play the most and which one is my “favorite.” Right now I’ve been beating the hell out of my American Telecaster and writing new stuff. Teles are great guitars. If I had it to do again, 10 of my 30 would be Teles. (But as it is, I’m very happy with the ones I’ve got…despite how nice that Isbell signature guitar looks…)

And I don’t know…I’m sleepy and have a lot of stuff to do tomorrow and this weekend. So I’m going to stop there for now. Just wanted to get something a little less bleak on the blog.

————

Current Listening:

  • Descendents – 9th & Walnut
  • The Kinks…just in general…

I’m in the worst financial situation of my life and I don’t know what I’m going to do. This isn’t a joke.

It’s 2 in the morning as I’m starting to write this post, and I’m sure it’ll be coming up on 3 by the time it’s finished. I can’t sleep. You might’ve guessed that much.

I’ve been doing some math. As I wrote in my previous post I’ve just come into possession of a new (to me) car. And I’ve been having trouble selling the old one. You know how I said I was “presently” asking $4000? I’m getting about $800 from a salvage buyer. Because life is shit and you shouldn’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise. So that’s the first bit of math that sucks…but it gets worse… (And no, I’m not talking about having sunk $1835 into the car two weeks before deciding to sell it at a MAJOR loss…that’s lumped into this same issue.)

I had some bills increase. By substantial amounts in at least one case. And now I’ve got a car payment on top of that. The long and short of it is that if I buy the ABSOLUTE MINIMUM of groceries in a month and don’t do a goddamned thing other than go to work, I’ll have approximately $200/month left over after paying my bills. Maybe. In a GOOD month.

My life is changing for the worse and there’s no way out of it. I can accept that…but that doesn’t mean I know how to plan for it.

At bare minimum, I need a second job. Or a better-paying primary job. If anyone has any leads on either, I’m listening. I’ve been a music minister, a librarian, and an insurance rep–those are the only three jobs I’ve ever had in my life. My college degree is essentially from a Christian tech-school and isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on…that’s a mistake I made as a teenager that I’ve still got $5,228.59 left in loans to pay off… They don’t do a very good job of explaining how that’s going to cripple you when you sign up for college–if they did, no one would go. (If my student loan debt alone went away I could at least breathe a little…but that’s still at least 2 years away if I keep paying the minimum…probably more like 3, considering interest…)

Additionally, my back is pretty much shot and I can’t afford the deductible to go see a doctor to even start thinking about maybe getting it fixed… So I can’t do jobs that require a lot of physical labor… But if you’ll hire me to do something I’d sure appreciate it… I’m good with computers and filing and stuff like that. I work well at a desk. Data entry is one of my strong-suits. (I don’t even need to understand what I’m entering, I just need to know how you want it entered.) Or if you need a regular sound engineer for something…that’s something I do, too.

I like my current job. I don’t want to leave it or anything like that… But I can’t live like this…if I have one even MINOR medical issue, I’m penniless. I know that most people in America are in that same position, don’t get me wrong…but this is scary. It’s bad. Because my car broke down once too often. And to another extent because over the years I’ve made too many purchases on a credit card in the good faith that one day I’d make grown-up money and that hasn’t fucking happened. I see all the mistakes of my life absolutely clearly now…and it boils down to “I fucked up and went to Bible College, then fucked up more by living like I didn’t.”

Y’know, friends of mine talk about “not making a lot” and then drop $50-60K into the conversation like I’m supposed to gasp at their pittance… I don’t make anywhere NEAR that. Those would be absolutely life-changing numbers to me… And I need to find a way to start getting closer to them. A second job seems the easiest path, since…well since all the above shit is wrong with my life resulting in me not being qualified for anything.

I’m deciding which guitars to sell, too. Some will almost definitely have to go. If there’s one you want to bid on, let me know. I’m not kidding. I can’t afford to keep releasing music with them anyway. Only a couple are off limits.

I’m also done going to record stores. Or buying movies. Or books. Or anything. I can’t afford anything. Don’t invite me to do anything, please. I’m weak and I’ll go with you, and it will mean I can’t eat for a couple days. Don’t ask me to do stuff. I can’t even buy the gas to meet you to at your place so you can drive to the thing I can’t afford to do. If you love me, leave me out of your plans. Please. (I’m feeling nostalgic for everything in the country being completely shut down right now.)

There are unquestionably months where I’m going to be in the red. Family members will keep having birthdays. And Christmas will still take place. And I’ll just have to hope that when I go to those parties food is provided and I can sneak some home in my coat, I guess…

I don’t know what I’m going to do. I’ve never been in this position before. I’m very, very scared and I don’t know if I’m going to get through this. It’s bad. It’s very, very bad. I need to be making $200-500/month more than I am to even see a light at the end of the tunnel. People seem to think it’s a joke when I say I view getting a new car as a negative…but it’s not a joke. This has ruined me. I’ve never felt this helpless. Never. Even if the car-stuff hadn’t happened, the increased bills would’ve meant some serious cutbacks…but now? I don’t have the same life I did three weeks ago anymore and I don’t see any way to get it back.

So that’s why I’m up.

Driving Onward…

Alright, well…so it’s been a heck of a couple of weeks…

Remember how I mentioned in my last post that I got my car back but I now have to jiggle the key to get it started after the stellar work that Bommarito Ford in Hazelwood, MO did on something completely unrelated to that, even though it wasn’t happening before (Trump donating) Bommarito Ford worked on it? And remember how I said I was hoping to make it a month before taking it in (somewhere other than Bommarito Ford) to fix that? And how I might end up selling the car in six months at that rate?

Well…

The ignition crapped out on me and I can’t get it started. Thankfully it’s parked somewhere that I could leave it…because at that point I decided I was done. That’s a small fix. But it’s another $500 on top of the $1835 I paid to Bommarito Ford in Hazelwood, MO for the problem that existed *prior* to taking it to them. (That dealership again: Bommarito Ford in Hazelwood, MO.) And…I’m out. I’m tapping out.

So I got a new car. And I’m working on selling the one that broke down. (I figured selling it myself would result in a better price than taking a non-running car in for a trade-in. Long story short, it’s not going well. If anyone wants it, the ACV is $5900, but there are some dents and dings and the ignition needs to be fixed. I’m presently asking $4000.) 

I wasn’t planning on having a new car just yet. I was hoping to make it a couple years to begin with, but even as it is I still got it a LOT sooner than I was prepared to once I made the decision. I went to see a friend who sells used cars (and is also a pastor–way to lean into the stereotype). My plan was to LOOK at a couple and just start getting an idea of what’s in my price-range and what my options might be. And he ended up having me test drive a 2013 Chevy Equinox. And I liked it. And even though it was sooner than I wanted it to be, I popped on it and long-story short after some finagling that also involved my dad, it came home with me.

I like it. It’s fine. But I still view getting a car and having a payment for the next several years as a major loss that really fucks up a lot of things about my life. But to keep working since the pandemic is (VERY FUCKING FAR FROM BUT I GUESS WE’RE IGNORING IT) over, I have to have a car. So I do. At least the stereo’s good. And it’s roomy. If anybody would like to suggest any bumper-stickers that need to go on it, feel free. (There’s a fee of $4000 if your suggestion wins.)

It only came with one key. So I should probably have a second key made. I don’t know how to do that. Or who to ask. Or what it will cost. Probably too much. Whatever.

And I need to go to the fucking DMV to…do whatever the hell it is you do in this situation. I don’t know. I’m going to take a copy of EVERYTHING and just hope I can still sit down in a chair after they’re done doing what they do to me. (Spoiler alert…I won’t.)

It’s dumb that you have to pay your sales tax at the DMV after buying a vehicle. It’s…I just signed away a shitload of money and now I have to give somebody ELSE more of it for no reason… I’m sure there are stand up comics who’ve pointed out how stupid that is before. This is old ground… But imagine buying a TV and then having to go to a different, bureaucratic hellscape to pay the sales tax on it. What kind of God would allow that?

But hey for the handful of people younger than me who don’t know to do this…any time anybody, ESPECIALLY a car dealer, says “no money down” to you, the next words out of your mouth need to be, “And how does my payment change if I put down (amount you’re able to put down)?” Because it could drop by HUNDREDS if you can put a few thousand dollars down on a car. “No money down” just fucks you in the (pretty immediate) future. Don’t ever fall for that shit. Nobody tells you that. So there. I told you that.

So…now I’ve got a car. And a payment. Which is going to hurt. A LOT.

But hey…at least it’s all my fault for trying to do my best.

Anyway, my podcast is going to have a new episode this weekend.

I can no longer find random Simpsons quotes, so I guess I’m just writing whatever here now…

So what has happened since May 22? It’s been a month since I last wrote. I used to do this daily. I guess when I was younger I had more to say. Now I just say the same shit over and over and people are like, “there he goes again…” But I digress. Let’s do this in the way where I just talk about stuff as it occurs to me and I number it and whatnot… In 2004 we called that “everything/nothing” but all those little shits who run YouTube now probably call it something else.

  1. For several years I did this gimmick with a random Simpsons quote in the title. But the webpage I used to use to generate a random quote has been taken down because Disney won’t let anyone have any harmless fun–even with properties they didn’t create and yet profit from, despite the fact that quoting those properties doesn’t hurt them in any way, shape, or form… So that gimmick’s dead. And so is a part of my soul. Thanks Disney, you fucks.. Daffy can kick Donald’s ass any fucking day of the week, by the way. And fuck Mickey, too. Just fuck him in the neck.
  2. I got my car back. It cost me $1835. But I got my car back. Now I just need it to run for another year to two and I can trade it in. I’m not sure it’ll make it. But I’ve got a friend at a Kia dealership that I’m looking forward to visiting whenever it happens… When I got the car back, it came with a slight problem. Now I’ve got to jiggle the key to get it to start. I didn’t used to have to do that. That’s new, since having taken it to (known Trump supporter) Bommarito Ford in Hazelwood, MO. Prior to that I never had to jiggle the key in my life. Including the day it died. But after paying (again, known Trump supporter) Bommarito Ford in Hazelwood, MO $1835, now I have to jiggle the key to get it to start. So EVERY time I start it comes with the possibility of it not starting–moreso than usual. I’m not SAYING that they broke that on purpose to try to fuck me out of another $400, but if one were to draw that conclusion, I couldn’t possibly stop you. So I’ll have to fix THAT eventually too…but I’m hoping it makes it a month or two before I do….
    Shit… I might sell this thing in 6 months instead of waiting…
  3. I went back to my office for a day last week and I’m planning on going back a day this week. I’m easing in. They want us to all start transitioning back in July, so I’m taking it literally one day at a time. The first day went okay. I’ve been having some pretty extreme anxiety attacks any time I’ve had to walk into a public building lately, so I was worried about it…but no problems on the first day. It helped that the first people I saw were my direct boss (who I’ve known since college), my best friend (who I’ve known since the 90s), and my very good friend (who I’ve known since about 2014). It felt safe and basically comfortable. But if I’m honest, I am definitely going to miss a LOT about working from home. I feel like I’ve been thriving in this environment. But I know many others have been struggling pretty bad. So I get it. I’ve got to go back. Fortunately, that seems like it won’t be so bad. After my first day, I rewarded myself with a banana split.
  4. By the way, I’m presently checking in at 155 lbs. My lowest weight was 145 at the very end of 2019, but I’ve mostly been 150-155 since. The diet worked and I’ve been intentional about making it stick. Everybody can do that. You just have to want it enough to eat a potato instead of a bag of potato chips. (That said, medically speaking I should be more like 135…but I lost 100 fucking pounds… I’ll take it for now.)
  5. I’ve been on a Tragically Hip kick. In the past week I’ve listened to Gord Downie’s complete solo discography, several of The Hip’s albums, and watched a couple BluRays. They were great and a lot of Americans (including myself) missed out on them for a long time.
  6. My family got together for a bit on Father’s Day. It was good to see everybody. My brother has a smoker/grill that runs on wood pellets and he takes any opportunity he can to fire it up (as would we all). He cooked some really fucking good chicken this time. (He’s also done really fucking good burgers, really fucking good hot dogs, really fucking good brats, really fucking good pork steaks, and so on…) My grill is currently a rusty mess and unusable. Which is probably the best thing for my health. But I would like a goddamn steak sometime…and I’m not ready to go into restaurants to get one yet.
  7. Since my last post I turned 41. My birthday went fine. We did that at Dave’s place, too. Got cool gifts. I’m slowly working my way through a 10-disc(!) collection of the Woodstock festival. There are a lot of bands you don’t remember and stage announcements you don’t care about between your CSNYs and Whos and Hendrixes and so on… (Is that how you pluralize “Hendrix,” by the way? Has anyone else had to do that?) It felt a little better than my 40th, which was spent in isolation, for sure. I hope in 2022 I can do what I WANTED to do for my 40th and just set up shop at one of my favorite bars (probably Blueberry Hill) and just have people come by for a burger and a beer (or whatever’s your poison). But we’ll see… I’ll be able to justify it…after all, when I’m 42, I’ll officially be the answer to the question of life, the universe, and everything…
  8. You know how some bullshit people say you’re supposed to speak your wishes into the universe to manifest them? Well Jason Isbell signature Telecaster. Okay?
  9. I’ve been reading a lot lately. I’ll probably go into that on the podcast though, so I don’t want to go into detail now…but I’m running low on stuff…
  10. The podcast will be returning soon, by the way. I’ve been posting occasional updates from my phone app while gearing up for the next real episode. You can check that out at emptychecking.podbean.com, I bet… It’s been a difficult journey to get the podcast working again… And it isn’t over yet… But we’re closer than we’ve been since whenever the hell I did my last full episode.

That’s it, I guess.

Get vaccinated. Black Lives Matter. Trans rights are human rights. Women should be paid the same as men. And all the other stuff that pisses off people who’re already pissed off by the rest of this paragraph.