1. I’ve had a bit of a cold lately.  Why is it that when you’ve got a cold, people can call you a wimp for feeling bad and wanting to stay in and just be ill?  I’ve had the flu before and I’ve had food poisoning, etc etc…  And I never feel as bad as when I have a “simple” head-cold.  I think you should get a free pass to be miserable and pissy when you’ve got a cold.  But I seem to be largely alone in that.
2. I’ve semi-resumed working on the next solo record, but I’m much more focused on Two Hangmen.  Rehearsals with Dave Knobel playing drums have been going pretty well, and I’m excited about what I think we’re capable of doing.  The solo record is an exercise and it’s a lot of fun…but there’s nothing like playing in a band.
3. Comic books purchased this week:
   • Justice League #5
   • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #6
   • The Flash #5
   • The Unwritten #33.5
   • Superman #5
   • Captain America & Bucky #626
4. In my ever-spiriling-out-of-control, onward quest to find a cooler guitar tone, I’ve once again re-ordered my pedal-board.  Removed some stuff I’m not using added some stuff I’ve been missing.  Using the power of the amp a little bit more than in recent years.  Completely uninteresting to anyone but me…  But the short version is that I’m having a lot of fun figuring out which tone goes with which guitar and how to shape it.  My distortions and effects respond completely differently to my Telecaster than they do to my Les Paul, and it’s a lot of fun for me to experiment with that.
5. I miss Conan O’Brien’s beard (again).  I’m on record as being pro-beard just in general…but Conan’s specifically just one of those dudes who looks better with a beard.
6. Let me share something with you…  If you ever piss me off…like REALLY badly piss me off.  Like the kind of pissed off where I’ve stormed out of the room, called you a name, cursed your mother, and punched your cat on my way…THAT level of pissed off…  The way back into my heart?  Milky Way candy bar.  No bullshit.
7. I’ve been trying not to be as political on the blog ever since Obama won in 08, but I’ve gotta say this…  If Newt is the Republican nom, I’m not sure I’m even going to vote.  It just doesn’t seem important or necessary to vote against him.
8. Bought a new razor, on account of my face being overly furry.  (I like beards…but seriously, this is out of hand.)  Is it weird that I’m looking forward to trying it out?
9. Read through book two of “Sandman” in one sitting.  It was really good.  A little brutal in places, but so was the first one…part of the genre.  But this is really an excellent series.  Read one of the four stores in book three, but this book’s stories kind of stand alone and aren’t as epic in nature.  Only read the first one so far, so I can’t say for sure, but I think I liked the first two books a little better (though I could’ve done without the spider stuff in book 2, even though it was done VERY sparingly), where they were more arching stories.  Still though, I’m very glad I’m finally reading this story.
10. …and also I still have a job.  So that’s cool.

And that’s it for now.  Go out and live.  Turn off the computer and LIVE!!!

————

Just kidding!  Leave your computer on.  Here’s more words…

Current/Recent Listening:

• Lou Reed – Berlin — Listened to it three times on Tuesday.  It’s lyrically very dark, but musically a masterpiece.  (And dark lyrics aren’t a big deal to me…I actually kind of find that sort of thing reassuring.)  I don’t know why “Men of Good Fortune” isn’t the most covered song in the world, but it probably should be.  And the guitar tones are just amazing.  But yeah…it’s a sad record.  Which is actually kinda cool and adds to the effect of it, coming right on the heels of the super-glam “Transformer” record like it did.
• Lou Reed – Set the Twilight Reeling — An overlooked 90s record of Lou’s that’s probably the best thing he did in that era.  Even if lyrically all he really did was write about whatever thought he had on the way to the studio that morning.  (The first song is basically summed up as “I’d really like an Egg Cream.  Remember Egg Cream?  Guys?”)  Title track’s genius, and again, such lovely CLEAN guitar tones.
• Black Francis – Bluefinger — Not to be confused with a popular James Bond villain, this is Frank Black’s return to the Black Francis moniker and it sounds like the Pixies record that never happened.

  …so there’s some stuff to check out, if you’re looking.  Though it’s all best described as an acquired taste.

Anyway…  Song-list:

1. Hope to Carry On
2. Blessed Be Your Name
3. How Great Thou Art
4. By His Wounds/Nothing But the Blood
5. How Great Thou Art — Reprise (this is the bit I sang)
   T-shirt worn: “Read Vonnegut”

On another note, we did something kind of interesting today.  Allow me to rant for a bit…

In groups at our tables (our churches sits at tables…because pews are too mainstream) we were all asked to share the thing we need to let go and surrender to Jesus—THE thing.  The thing you don’t talk about because it’s too embarrassing or damning.  One of the leaders of the church (name and sin withheld) started us off by telling the whole room his “thing” and it was a big one.  So we were all kind of on the hook at that point—which sounds like a nightmare, I know, but I’m sure if you just said “Nope.  Not telling.” or went with a lesser “thing” no one would’ve cared much.  One of the church leaders (again, name/sin withheld) was sitting in my group and shared his “thing” and followed up by saying that he always feels nervous about confessing stuff like that because of the expectations placed on ministers…that they’re supposed to STOP being human once they enter the pulpit.

That, of course, is bullshit.

One of the main things I like about my church is that we’re a bunch of people.  Screwed up—nay, fucked up—people.  And we all know that.  I have yet to experience any judgement or scolding for my problems—even the ones I probably SHOULD have by now.  And it dawned on me today…that doesn’t happen at our church (so far), not because we’re better or worse Christians, but because looking around the room, I saw a lot of people who’d come from other churches where they HAD been judged.  I think a lot of us who’ve been there a while have stories that include some variant of, “and then the chairman of the elders/the youth minister/the pastor called me and it got ugly.”  Usually over a non-issue…  Usually over just being human enough to admit you’re fucked up and to OWN it, and sometimes be trapped by it.  The Church Universal doesn’t care for that.

I think sometimes well-meaning church leaders and assorted busybodies see someone’s flaws and (often with good intentions) immediately think, “GASP!” (Yes, in my world they SAY “gasp.”)  “What will the sinners think if they see a CHRISTIAN being human?!?”  You can almost hear the prosecutor saying, “The prisoner who now stands before you was caught red-handed showing feelings.  Showing feelings of an almost HUMAN nature.  This will not do!”  And the clergy are among the first to be crucified.  When Jesus would probably…y’know…forgive and try to help.  Sadly not an uncommon story in the Church Universal.  Sadly, not an uncommon story among the members of my church…  But at least now we’re together.  No old man who should’ve stepped down from the lofty perch of Elder years ago is wagging his finger at us…at least not yet.

And I think that’s what the Church Universal is turning into as the previous generation starts to lose its hold on it.  It’s left with us.  The kids who were yelled at for spilling the communion.  The teens who smoked in the church parking lot and had the elders tell the youth minister to ask them to leave.  The former ministers who had other leaders in their church examine their lives and declare them unworthy to serve Christ.  The Bible College graduates who couldn’t find work in a church because their band plays in bars, and they like to keep a couple cold beers in the fridge.  The porn addicts.  The would-be teen moms who saw no way out but to have the abortion.  The guy who stole money from petty-cash to pay his rent, hoping to pay it back someday.  The car thief.  The bad parents.  The drunks.  People who are broken, rejected, and lost…and we wandered around long enough that we found Jesus, who accepted us…so we huddle together, away from the bad old men in suits who told us we could have Jesus, as long as it was THEIR Jesus.

We’re hurt.  We’re abandoned.  Struck down, but not destroyed…  Fucked up, but not condemned.  We’re the Church.

And I’m very grateful for the one I’ve somehow fallen in with.

(It should be made clear that we don’t all swear as much as I do, and at least most of those descriptions were made up and not meant to describe anyone specific…) 

I’m going to be working extra hard on my Internet “presence” (if any) in the coming weeks.  I’m going to be fixing some stuff with both my own and my band’s websites.  I’m going to be adjusting how I do online music sales.  Though I’ve found a cheaper solution to what I’ve been using, I’m considering removing my music from iTunes, Rhapsody and Napster and just selling MP3s directly through the website.  I might still stay on iTunes, just for the sake of it…but Rhapsody’s definitely gone (because the streaming thing they do actually KEEPS people from buying it, based on my sales stats) and Napster’s been worthless and hasn’t brought me a dime…  But I think I found a cool, easy way to sell MP3s in a form that looks not totally dissimilar to a blog.  Mostly because it’s software that WordPress developed.  Gotta play around with it a little first though.  Also plan to keep the Tumblr page going strong and I’m going to revive the podcast sometime within the next couple of months.  (I know…I’ve said that before…)

I’ve also massively increased my Tweeting volume.  Found a good, free app for my phone that makes it easy to tweet and doesn’t cost me any texts.  So now I’m posting random nonsense and happenings at the speed of Derek.  Facebook’s still a big thing for me though, because it’s where discussions happen…so I think of that as the MAIN micro-blogging I do, and Twitter’s just for pretending the thoughts in my head are worth sharing.  (Spoiler alert — They’re not!)

Dunno why…just in the past week, I’ve found myself with a big bucket of Internet Can-Do!  So I’m striking while the iron’s hot…because we all know I’m going to get lazy again really, really soon.

…oh…and when I’m closer to knowing when the new record (Pop Art Manifesto) will “drop” (as the kids have stopped saying), I’m going to do a complete re-design of the website.  Already designing it, but it’s not going live for a while.  Right now it’s mostly just conceptual sketches–haven’t gotten my website building program back up and running yet, after the Great Laptop Crash of 2011…  But if I can make it look as cool as it does in my head and make it as simple and user-friendly as possible, I think we’ll all be happy.

And I have no idea why I’m writing all this right now.  I’ve just missed blogging about things like this, I guess. 

————

Current Reading (Comic Books):

• Batman — Been really enjoying it ever since the relaunch.  Thought the “Court of Owls” sounded stupid when I first heard about it, but now I can’t get enough, and I’m very excited to hear that the “Court” will be at the center of a major event, spanning all of the Bat Books this year.
• Morning Glories — Still one of the best things on stands.  Always weird.  Always intense.  And this issue has some of the best dating advice I’ve ever heard in it. ”You need to find some girl who’s not doing you a favor every time she looks in your direction.”
• Deadman — Shocked that I actually like this character in the New 52.  Never had much use for him, but from Brightest Day onward (and especially in Flashpoint), Deadman’s been a good read.
• Sandman — Waiting on trades #2 & 3 to arrive in the mail from Barnes and Slowble.  (I call them that because their online shipping sucks.  I ordered them on Sunday.  They were in stock.  They didn’t ship until 10:30 last night and won’t be here until Monday.  Not the first time they’ve been this slow.  Membership card?  Not renewed. — Though I must say, when I order stuff in-store, it’s much faster.)  Can’t wait to dig deeper into the character and let the story unfold deeper and deeper.  Even before he really knew what he was doing (as he himself has admitted), Gaiman was awesome.

Okay look…the “chance” of tornadoes developing is just plain, flat-out fear mongering for ratings on the part of the news channels.  Channel Four in my area is being particularly transparent.  Weather guy actually just said, “The storm has weakened, and the National Weather Service has allowed the warning to expire, but I still feel like this is a storm that I need to continue to watch and track for you.”  Sad.

As many remember, St. Louis had (I think) five tornadoes tear through here on Good Friday of last year.  Remarkably, no one died or was very seriously injured as a result.  Other areas were not near as lucky.  Just prior to that, many lives were lost in Alabama and Georgia in big storms.  Then slightly after the St. Louis tornadoes, the devastation in Joplin took place.  And now the news stations are playing on the fears of the masses every time it drizzles.  Bugs me.  A lot.  This kind of thing is actually why we DON’T take bad weather very seriously around here.  A tornado warning is just a graphic on the screen to most of us, because we know that 999 out of 1000 times, they’re just making too big a deal out of nothing for screen-time.

…and since the thunder is keeping me awake (because I’m sleeping with my window open, since it’s 70-degrees in JANUARY—and we may talk about how much I hate that in a different post later), I thought I’d rant about it for a little bit.

And I’m done now.  Please resume enjoying the Internet.

————

Worship Song List from Pursuit on 1/15/12:

1. Blessed Assurance
2. Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing
3. Softly and Tenderly
4. Be Thou My Vision
5. Victory in Jesus
   T-shirt worn: Reverend Horton Heat

Been a weird week.  I’ve been going back and forth from not feeling very good to feeling great to feeling okay except my shoulder hurts, to whatever…  (I have no idea what I did to my shoulder, by the way…but I did the HELL out of it.)  I don’t really have anything in particular in mind to write about, so—as you can probably tell by the insane post title—we’re going to do that “random” thing I do…

1. I’m anxiously awaiting the new Leonard Cohen record.  At some point, Cohen went from being an artist I was aware of but not wild about to being one of my favorite artists.  I think it started in 2009 when I picked up his “Live in London” record, just for kicks.  It’s sublime (to borrow a word he himself uses on that record to describe his background singers).  Got to see him two years ago (or thereabout, might’ve only been one—but it FEELS like two years, anyway), and that remains one of my favorite shows I’ve been to in the 2000′s.  So I’m very excited that he’s doing a new record of NEW material.  Not a lot of people in their 70s do that.  I’m getting the version offered on his website that comes with a limited edition, numbered lithograph.  The lithograph prominently features a (tastefully done) nude lady, so I kinda had to talk myself into it…but like I said, he’s in his 70s.  Not likely to get too many more lithographs from him.  And it really is beautifully done.
2. I think I’m going to make some chili tomorrow.  Then on Saturday, I’m going to get a burger from Five Guys, pour some of the chili on it, and then eat the burger.  Looking forward to either enjoying an awesome concoction…or going to the hospital.  Either way, probably a blog post in it.
3. Snowed in St. Louis.  I like when that happens.  MoDot dropped the ball on the road-treatment though (and they basically admitted as much).  We got an inch or less and you’d think there were six inches.  Part of that is just because people in this town freak out when it RAINS, much less snows and they forget how to drive…but also, MoDot completely failed to pre-treat the streets in advance of the storm, so it ended up pretty slippery out there.  Still, I got to work and back with no real problems and was surprised to hear co-workers talking about a much icier ride than I personally experienced.  Guess I was lucky.  Took a long time getting there this morning, but it was better going home.  Plus, I like snow, and I like Winter…and you Summer-loving jerks have gotten enough nice weather to last you for a snow storm or two this season…so let me have my fun!
4. Finally started reading Neil Gaiman’s “Sandman” comic book.  It sort of revolutionized the genre when he first wrote it (between 1989-1996).  That was a little bit before I got serious about reading comics (though I was definitely buying trades in at least the later part of the 90s), and I definitely wasn’t into his sort of stuff at that time or for a few years after…but reading it now, I feel cheated that I didn’t read it when it was new.  I’m almost tempted to only read one issue a week, just to experience some delayed gratification to somewhat mimic the experience people had at the time…but let’s face it.  I’m an American.  Gimmie gimmie gimmie!  Only about three issues in so far, but it’s great.  Can’t believe how long I’ve been missing out.
5. For those wondering about my kitchen (ie – no one), there’s some trim that has to go up and I need to get a microwave…but it’s very very close to done.  It’s just little stuff now.  I’ll post some pics on the Tumblr page soon.  I’m particularly thrilled with how the backsplash turned out.  The contractor put up way more tile than I was originally planning, but it turned out to be exactly the right thing to do.  And I LOVE the look of the cabinets.  Just need to clean up the other (visible) rooms and get my dishes washed and put IN the cabinets…and we’re good! 
6. As I’m writing this, I’m getting a headache that’s getting worse.  It’s weird.
7. Earthquake in Haiti happened two years ago today (err…yesterday, since it’s now after midnight…oops…).  There are estimates that 95% of the rubble from the quake still has not been removed or even addressed, and hundreds of people are still living in tent cities.  (Well…there will probably always be tent cities there…but a lot of those specific people didn’t USED to live in tent cities.)  Still worth Googling some of the benevolent organizations that are ACTIVELY working in Haiti, if you’ve got some free time.  (Or just click over to my friend Shara Lyn’s blog to see what her life there is like and what you can do to help.  You can also leave me a note in the comments and I’d be glad to provide some contact info for organizations there that I know are reliable.)
8. Been listening to a lot of Lou Reed again/still.  Particularly enjoying “Songs for Drella,” which he wrote with John Cale (formerly of The Velvet Underground) in tribute to Andy Warhol.  Made myself a list of Lou Reed records I’d like to buy…it is…longer than expected…

And that’s all I’m going to write for now…  Headache’s gaining momentum, so I’m thinking I’m going to pop some Ibuprofen and go to bed.

Enjoy your weekend!

1. Accidents Will Happen – Elvis Costello
2. The Creature Crawling – Frank Black
3. She is Fading – Vigilantes of Love
4. Fan Club [Demo] – Cheap Trick
5. Young Girl – Gary Puckett and the Union Gap
6. Soul Meeting – Solomon Burke
7. She’s a Dream – Grace Basement
8. Girl You’ll Be a Woman Soon – Gary Puckett and the Union Gap
9. Each Day of Sorrow – John Mellencamp
10. Run Rudolph Run – Reverend Horton Heat
11. 21 Reasons – Frank Black & the Catholics
12. Thirty One Today – Aimee Mann
13. The Pilgrim – Iron Maiden
14. Far Side Banks of Jordan – Johnny Cash
15. Graveyard Shift – Uncle Tupelo
16. Red House – Jimmi Hendrix
17. A New Machine – Part 2 – Pink Floyd
18. I Want You – Bob Dylan
19. Riding on the Wind – Judas Priest
20. Heartbreak Hotel – Willie Nelson
21. Every Time I See Your Face – Live
22. Army Reserve – Pearl Jam
23. I Want to Hold Your Hand – The Beatles
24. The Door is Always Open – Waylon Jennings
25. The ‘In’ Crowd – Bryan Ferry
26. Within You Without You – The Beatles
27. Sweet November – Derek Brink
28. Imaginary Man – Ray Davies
29. Snake Bite Love – Motorhead
30. Manifesto No. 2 – Shooter Jennings
31. And I Love Her (German Stereo Version) – The Beatles
32. Jagged (Live Version) – Old 97s
33. Someday You’ll Call My Name – Hank Williams Sr.

On a side note…  Seems like Gary Puckett wrote a lot of songs about underage girls.  Never found that creepy until now.

Following are a couple of the movies/projects I’ve forgotten he was in and a couple stories revolving around them.

1. The Harry Potter Movies
   Role: Some Guy.  Probably a Villain.
   Okay…to be fair, I haven’t seen any of the Harry Potter movies.  Why?  Interestingly enough, my response to that question is just restating the question.  You: “You haven’t seen the Harry Potter flicks?  Why?!?” Me: “Why should I?”  Well…the answer to my question might be “because Gary Oldman’s in one or two of them.”
2. Batman Begins
   Role: Commissioner Jim Gordon
   Well…I mean, I know it NOW.  It’s always in my brain NOW…  But at the time the movie came out, a few friends and I were talking about it and got to discussing the cast.  We started out talking about Katie Holmes (who I still maintain did fine, since there’s really not much to the “I’m in love with Bruce Wayne” role).  Part of the group’s defense of the actress was that even if she’d done the most amazing job in the world, the deck was stacked against her.  Christian Bale…Michael Caine…Liam Neeson…  Those are some heavy hitters.  We talked and talked about how well each actor did…then after a few minutes I said, “Wow…how good does Gary Oldman have to be that none of us remembered he was Commissioner Gordon?!?”  And that was the first time I realized that about him.
3. A really funny episode of FRIENDS.
   Role: Some British Actor
   Oldman played a British actor working in a movie with the Joey character.  He owned the screen for every moment of his performance.  He was funny both when he was playing the intimidating legit actor, and also when he was playing the staggering drunk.  He communicated things about the character’s backstory that definitely weren’t in the script (which I can TOTALLY confirm, never having read it!) and made the episode a lot of fun.  And yet, we all think of it as “The One With Monica and Chandler’s Wedding.”
4. The Fifth Element
   Role: Jean-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg (The main bad guy)
   …actually to be fair, I actually completely forgot all of The Fifth Element.  That was just a terrible movie with flawwed reasoning.  Oldman’s character has been paid to destroy all of existence—which would include HIMSELF and the money he was paid to do so…and it wasn’t a covert thing, his character knew that’s what he was doing.  Still…I believed Oldman’s character was nuts enough that none of that was a problem for him.
5. Dracula
   Role: Fucking DRACULA.
   I seriously had no idea until I read it on IMDB tonight.  And I don’t think it was because of the makeup—although I now realize how excellent it was.
6. JFK
   Role: Lee Harvey Oswald
   Until very recently, I honestly thought Oswald was played by a no-name, Russian actor.  I had no idea it was Gary Oldman until I heard him mention having worked on JFK in an interview and then it dawned on me.  Nuts.
7. Sid & Nancy
   Role: Sid Vicious
   Yep.  That’s him.  This was kind of the movie that launched him in many people’s eyes—though not his first movie.  I saw it and thought he was great…then promptly forgot about it.  I mean sure…maybe that’s because the end of the movie is a sloppy mess…but I remember being amazed by his performance, despite it being just an okay movie.

…and that’s just a handful.  Fortunately Oldman is still young and active enough that he’s got (hopefully) a ton of films ahead of him.  I look forward to forgetting him for years to come.

I wanted to re-visit a couple of the points from that list.  These are what I consider the worst offenses you can commit in my home/studio.  I’m keeping some of the wording the same, but changing up some of it too…  So let’s go…

1. Do your homework.
   • The time to decide on an arrangement and/or to write a new song is NOT when you’re paying an engineer to be there. I don’t want to sit there and listen to the band’s main songwriter say, “Don’t play it like that.”  Then the band member says, “That’s how I’ve been playing it since the first time!”  Then the main guys says, “Yeah, and you’ve been playing it wrong, but I haven’t told you.”  What?  Why is it just NOW coming up?  It’s not my job to sit there and listen to you fight, and it’s definitely not my place to offer an opinion on it when the emotions are running high—even though you’re definitely going to ask me to.  For the record, it is my opinion that the guy who wrote it is right.  It’s his song, and it’s his call.  Especially if it’s his BAND.  If it’s called the John Smith Experience, and you’re anyone other than John Smith…shut up and play what he tells you to.
   • Keep in mind though that sometimes you’ll hear a playback and realize that what you’re doing doesn’t work.  I’ve been in more than one situation where I’ve heard a take back and said, “Wow.  That’s WAY too busy.”  Recording reveals your weaknesses as well as your strengths.  Sometimes you end up re-writing a little in the studio…but in all, you should at least know the notes and structure, even if the specifics fluctuate a little bit out of necessity.
2. Do everything you can to make it easy on the engineer.
   • Money isn’t enough.  It just isn’t.  It can buy you a LOT, but it isn’t everything.
• I might not like your music.  Maybe it’s not my cup of tea.  Maybe you don’t play it well.  Maybe I started out liking it, but by take 19, I’m bored.  I’ve heard a lot of bands.  There’s a good chance that you’re going to play your epic would-be-hit and my response is going to be a hearty “meh.”  But even if I don’t like your music, I might still like YOU.  And if I like YOU, then I’m going to want to honor you by producing a project of which we can both be proud.  If you treat me as a friend and a colleague, I’m more likely to treat your music with the respect it deserves.  If you treat me as a piss-on, a yes-man, an employee, and/or a whipping-post, I’m not going to have a very high investment in your project.  I’m not at your beck-and-call…  I’m a person who has a day job and personal responsibilities and commitments…and who occasionally has a headache or a cold, or didn’t check his e-mail during the hours you sent me your notes about the project.  Treat me like I’m a person.
• Remember, the engineer is the guy who has your music in his hands, and you DO NOT want to piss him off.  An engineer, no matter how well paid, can only do so much with something he feels bad about putting his name on.  If he doesn’t feel motivated to do a good job, or if he feels like he’s been treated with hostility, he may still do a professional job, but it won’t be as good as it would have been if he were happy and felt like, “those were nice guys—I want to do right by them.”  As I’ve always said, 99% of your success comes because there were people who you didn’t piss off.
• In short…respect my time, especially if you’re in my home, and we’ll get along fine.
3. It will never sound “as good as it did in the room.”
   • Want to get me to shelve your project and never touch it again?  Then wait until I’ve spent an average of three hours per song mixing, mastering, EQing, deleting pops and hisses, correcting missed beats, adjusting levels on the guitar solos, etc, etc, etc…  Then say, “It sounded better when we were recording it.”  First of all, no it didn’t.  You have a complicated relationship with your music.  You hear a symphony when you strum an acoustic guitar.  The rest of the world hears an acoustic guitar.  You THINK it sounded better, because you’re in love with your own performance.  And that’s cool.  You SHOULD be…  But let’s be honest here…what’s more likely?  That you created rich, full, layered, perfect music in the studio while you were in raw, unmixed, unadjusted form…or that your guitar tone is a little thinner than you realized?  Or your bass drum doesn’t echo like it’s in a castle?  Or that your vocals aren’t life-changingly beautiful?  What’s more likely to be skewed by personal perspective?  Your memory of the “amazing” sound you had on a Saturday morning three weeks ago, or the microphones that were in front of your speaker?
   • Now, don’t get me wrong…sometimes a mix is bad.  Sometimes an engineer cranks up the bass too high or doesn’t get the vocals right where they should be or adds too much reverb or or or or…  But the absolute WORST way you can deal with that is to say, “I know you spent 15 hours on this five-song demo…but it sounded better in the room.”  Maybe instead you say, “Hey, it’s a little boomy…can you kill the reverb and cut back the lows a little?”  That’s not offensive.  That doesn’t dismiss the hours of work I did.  That’s a request and a preference, and I’ll honor it.  But “it sounded better in the room” is insulting to all of the time and effort I’ve invested into your project.  It HURTS to hear that…and remember what I said about money not being enough?  Effectively saying, “This sounded better before you wasted your time on it” is a GREAT way to make me hand you your money back, press “delete” and send you on your way.  I’m not kidding.  I’ve done that.
4. New Addition: Communicate Professionally
   • If you’re dealing with someone whose time you’re looking to take up, you need to be clear with them and not waste time with a lot of miscommunication and mixed messages.  Have ONE point of contact for your band.  Appoint ONE person to set the scheduling and offer notes and corrections to the engineer.  (Hint — It should probably be your most polite band member.)  I don’t want to have the guitar player call me and tell me it’s an awesome mix and not to change a note, then have the keyboard player call me and tell me they’re unhappy with all their performances and can we re-take their parts?  (That—specifically THAT—has happened to me.)  Get together as a band and present a united message.
   • If you’re the point person, it’s on YOU to have effective communication with the engineer.  Look…don’t send me a Facebook message.  I’m probably not going to see it.  Don’t text me.  I don’t know what “RU Stll on 4 2nite” means, and I don’t care.  Either send me a clear, concise e-mail with things I can check off a list, or give me a call.  But regardless of how you choose to contact me, if you don’t get me right away…give me a minute.  I might have gotten your voice-mail or email and I need to consult my calendar before calling you back.  I had a client recently send me three Facebook messages (sigh) in the same day.  I don’t check my Facebook messages very much, and I missed the first one until the second one came in a few hours later.  When I read the second one I realized I needed to look at the project before responding–it wasn’t an easy answer.  A couple of hours later, I received the third message which accused me of ignoring their prior two, when the truth is I just didn’t have an answer yet–it was the same DAY and I hadn’t reviewed their project in full yet.  I wasn’t wrist-deep in my recording program when I read their messages.  My first-draft of my response was less-than-courteous…but I cooled down and replied shortly, but reasonably.  In short…you don’t come into someone’s house, take up their free time, pay them less than they’re worth, then communicate with them through methods roughly akin to how a seventh-grader texts their boyfriend.  (“Whar RU? U diint reply yet! Dont U still like me?”) and expect an immediate, professional response.
   • I said before and I’ll say again…I’m a person.  This isn’t my full time job.  I have a day job.  I have personal commitments.  I am shy and want to know what I’m talking about before I respond to someone so I don’t get flustered.  I sometimes need a little bit before I dive into your project to handle the laundry list you’ve given me.  Sometimes I’m on Facebook because I want to bitch about my day or read the stupid statuses my friends posted…I don’t want to talk about work in that situation.  I’m there to ESCAPE work.  E-mail me.  I’ll print it out and deal with it as a checklist.  If you’re worried that I didn’t get your e-mail, give me a call THE NEXT DAY.  If you haven’t heard back from me right away, take a second to consider that I might be busy doing something that isn’t related to you.  I might be at a birthday party.  I might be working late.  I might be Christmas shopping.  I might be depressed and not want to talk to anyone.  I might be exhausted and not thinking straight, so I don’t want to give you poor information…  I might be drunk…  And so on…  When I’m working on your project, that doesn’t mean my every moment revolves around you.  It means that when I’m working on it, I’m working on it.  Be a professional and shoot me an e-mail or give me a call and wait for me to either reply or pick up.  (I will usually pick up my phone, unless you call me while I’m at work at my real job, or if I’m driving.)  Don’t hound me.  Don’t push me around.  Almost any business you contact sends you an auto-response of “we will reply within 24 hours.”  Please extend me the same courtesy.  I’ve probably got more going on than most businesses, and I can guarantee that my hours are weirder.

…and that’s it.  Just felt like throwing that out there.  Thanks for reading.  Sorry the last one got rambly.    (And if you’re the client referenced…don’t take it personally.  We’re good.)

————

Current Listening:

• Lou Reed and Metallica – “Lulu”
• Drive-By Truckers – “A Blessing and a Curse”

You probably can’t quite see all that…so let’s break it down:

1. Foo Fighters – Wasting Light
   There was little if any doubt that this would be my number-one of the year from the first moment I popped it in the player.  (And yes, I still buy and use the PHYSICAL PRODUCT.)  This record just DELIVERS from moment one.  Every track is solid.  This is the record Foos fans have been waiting on since the days that “Learn to Fly” was the only song you heard all summer.  It’s like I’ve been waiting for someone to write “Walk” ever since the 90s ended.
2. Flogging Molly – Speed of Darkness
   Definitely the band’s strongest release since “Drunken Lullabies,” and possibly better than that.  Less Irish than previous releases and more focused on the rock side of the group.  A strong record that serves not only as a great rock record, but also an excellent chronicle of the political, economic, and human state of our society (but never in a preachy way).  I’m not going to say that the fans who’ve been waiting for Dave King to call up Eddie Clark and reunite with Fastway would be happy with this one…but I am going to ask when the hell was the last time you heard someone talk about Fastway?
3. The Black Keys – El Camino
   A shockingly late entry to the list, and it shot right to the top five.  Came out just a little while ago—and I wasn’t even aware it was coming until like a week or two before it dropped.  A true, worthy follow-up to “Brothers.”  Not only does it have catchy melodies, infectious grooves, and fun, witty lyrics; it’s also got all the fuzz you can ask for, all in one place.  Great record, from a great band.  Good to see them getting the attention and acclaim they deserve.
4. Tom Waits – Bad As Me
   I love Tom Waits, but even as a fan this one knocked my socks off.  Popped it in for the first listen, and it immediately felt like it’d been in Waits’ catalog for a decade or so.  That’s how you know he did it right.  Waits seems to touch on all parts of his career on this one.  He has the bizarre “is he just stomping on stuff, and that’s supposed to be drums?” elements…but there are also grooves that, if you didn’t know better, you’d have thought were written for Elvis.  And Keith Richards plays guitar on about half the record.  So that’s kind of cool too.
5. Lou Reed & Metallica – Lulu
   If nothing else, this record belongs in the top five because it was by far the most controversial record of the year.  People (like myself) either stand by it as a bold, experimental, awesome statement, or they hate it for…reasons unknown.  Probably they just have no idea who Lou Reed is or what he does.  And I guess Metallica fans were expecting a Metallica record or something…because that seems to be how Metallica fans work these days.  Okay…granted…it sounds like Metallica got together and improvised to the rants of their crazy grandpa.  But I say what’s not to love about that???  The record would have been better billed as a solo Lou Reed record that just happened to have Metallica as his background band…I think that would’ve helped…but taken on its own merit instead of comparing it to what everyone assumed it would be, it’s a damn fine record that, though completely not catchy, will stick with you for a long time.  Probably the thing I’ve drifted back to the most this year, since buying it…and I think it’ll be a regular in my rotation for a long time.
6. CAKE – Showroom of Compassion
   I missed the boat on CAKE in high school/college.  I was kind of aware of them, but not a big fan.  I think I was listening to Rush or something, probably…  Saw CAKE perform “Sick of You” on Conan at the end of last year and knew I’d be buying this record when it came out (at the start of 2011).  It’s a strong return for a band I didn’t know I liked all along.  It’s infectious and fun.  Nothing not to like…and at one point, it was much higher up on the list, before “Lulu” and “El Camino” came out.
7. Beady Eye – Different Gear, Still Speeding
   The whole world wondered “What will happen to Oasis now that Noel has quit the band?!?”  The answer?  They stopped sucking and started kicking serious ass…and changed their name for some reason.  Beady Eye’s “debut” sounds like anything but, and delivers on every level.  If there were any justice, this would be what Brit-rock is all about…but unfortunately X Factor is a thing.
8. Hayes Carll – KMAG YOYO
   (KMAG YOYO is military shorthand for “Kiss My Ass Guys, You’re On Your Own!”)  Why Hayes Carll isn’t the biggest name in country music, I’ll never know.  Guess he doesn’t love America and beer and 9/11 enough or something.  This is an amazing record.  If the list were genre specific, this would be my number-one country record of the year.  It’s smart, it’s funny, it’s catchy, and he manages to deliver a couple of messages along the way, too.
9. Imelda May – Mayhem
   My brother introduced me to Imelda’s music earlier in the year, and it’s a blast.  Kind of like if Reverend Horton Heat and Brian Setzer had a daughter…and she was a cartoon.  If nothing else, the cover of Soft Cell’s “Tainted Love” is worth the purchase price alone…but fortunately, there’s plenty else to dig into here, too.
10. Deer Tick – Divine Providence
    VERY recent discovery for me.  Saw them on Conan about two weeks ago (maybe less?) performing “Funny Word” and they seemed like my cup of tea, so I picked up the record.  It’s got a few slow moments, but all in all they marry most of my favorite music styles into one super fun goulash.  Probably the best description I can come up with for them is that if you’ve ever wondered what it would’ve been like if the Clash had been an alt-country band…  Deer Tick.

And in case that wasn’t enough for you…  Here are the “runners-up” that I’ll probably re-listen to at some point in 2012 and wonder why they didn’t make the Top 10…

And since you can’t see those either…

• Centro-Matic – Candidate Waltz
  This one was in the top 10 until very recently, and I really struggled to drop it.  It’s a strong release.  More rock based that some of their more recent records, but still laid back.  Worth checking out.
• Those Darlins – Screws Get Loose
  Super fun band, and it was heartbreaking to cut them from the top 10.  Blame The Black Keys and Deer Tick for Those Darlins not making the cut.  Mostly girl group filled with both twang and rock at the same time.  You know that “Red Light Love” song from the Kia commercials?  That’s them!
• …And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead – Tao of the Dead
  I love ToD more than most people love the Beatles…but this record, though it was good just didn’t grab me quite enough to make the top 10.  Part of the problem is a poor vocal mix (can’t understand a word except for “pure cosplay.”  But mostly, I just feel like the last three records were so strong, this one just doesn’t quite match up.  Their previous record (“Century of Self”) is a hard record to follow, and there’s not shame in releasing something good, but not AS good.  But it IS good.  Don’t think I’m saying it’s not good.  It’s just not in my top 10.
• Wilco – The Whole Love
  This is another record that is hurt by the group’s previous record.  I loved “Wilco (the album)” and while I admire the fact that they released something that isn’t just a carbon copy of what I already liked…I just find myself listening to this one and saying, “It’s great…but where’s the rock?”  Still, taken on its own, a wonderful record, and it almost made the top 10.
• Old 97′s – The Grand Theater Vol. 2
  I think I just need to spend more time with this record.  I like it a lot, but it just never would’ve made it to the top ten, especially on the heels of “The Grand Theater Vol 1″ from last year.  I really think they should’ve just done a double-record, and it would’ve been perfect.  Still…good release.  I’ll probably regret not having it in the top ten by this time next year.

Biggest Disappointments (Which doesn’t necessarily mean they were bad records!):

• Drive-By Truckers – Go Go Boots
  I love the Drive-By Truckers more than some Christians I know love Jesus.  (But I love Jesus more than I love DBT…so that works out.)  But this record just isn’t very strong.  The title track is probably the weakest on the record, and the whole thing just seems like they went in on the heels of “The Big To Do” and said, “Alright, that was fun…but let’s stop rocking and being so awesome all the time.”  Don’t get me wrong…there are some real highlights, and I don’t HATE it.  “Everybody Needs Love” and “Mercy Buckets” will be on my DBT playlist forever…but—with no disrespect intended—when Shonna’s couple of tunes don’t sound out of place, then your rock band just isn’t rocking.  (But recently Shonna announced that she is parting ways with the band in an amicable split.  Perhaps more rocking is in our future?  Or less?  Or what the hell?)
• Dream Theater – A Dramatic Turn of Events
  Good record…but only good.  This is the band’s first ever record without founding member Mike Portnoy at the drum-kit.  They needed to blow me away…and they didn’t.  Don’t get me wrong…it’s solid.  Mike Mangini is a good fit and the record sounds like a bunch of guys who’ve been playing together for a couple of decades…but I think that’s the problem.  There’s not a lot of FIRE here.  They had something to PROVE with this record, and it sounds like they went in thinking they had NOTHING to prove.  But my real criticism isn’t with the songwriting (except for the bizarre choice to include a throat-singer on one track), but rather with the mix/master.  Everything’s in the mix, I guess…but there’s just no BALLS to the master.  It just seems like they recorded it, played it back and someone said, “That’s too loud.  Make it sound weaker.”  Maybe a remaster is all it needs…but as it is, it’s okay, but it’s not exactly the one I’d put on to impress anybody.
• Get Up Kids – There Are Rules
  I loved the Get Up Kids before they broke up.  I was excited to hear they were going to do a new record.  Then I bought it and wondered if I’d gotten the wrong CD in the right case.  The thing I loved about the Get Ups was their harsh, abrasive edge.  It’s just not there on this record.  Objectively, there are some really catchy songs here, and it’s a good record…but I’d rather it hadn’t been as polished and had a little more “fire” behind the sound.
• My Morning Jacket – Circuital
  Huge disappointment for me.  I loved “Evil Urges” and this one just doesn’t follow it very well.  Then I realized that the riff to the standout song on the record (“Still Holding on the Black Metal”) was just “Paperback Writer” with the last couple of notes switched around a little…and I don’t know if I have much use for this one.  I recently re-listened to it in my car and actually forgot it was on while it was playing.  There’s just nothing to grab onto here.  It’s like one of those acoustic folk acts playing in a restaurant you’re patronizing.  It’s fine…but it’s background music.  You’re not likely to applaud.  But I’m not DONE with them or anything…I’m just hoping I like the next one better.  (I think this one was a response to their hardcore fans who thought “Evil Urges” got too experimental, and they just went too far in the other direction.)
• Jayhawks – Mockingbird Time
  Just doesn’t measure up.  Everyone went apeshit about the fact that they got the classic lineup back together (as though any of us knew what the classic lineup was before we heard “Save it for a Rainy Day” in the first place), but I’ll be much more excited if they get the “Rainy Day Music” lineup back together.  I don’t know what’s missing from this album…but something is…and I miss it badly.
• Over the Rhine – The Long Surrender
  I don’t know…  I like it better than the previous record (“The Trumpet Child”) and maybe I just need the benefit of time to get used to it…but it just seems like they took the parts of “Drunkard’s Prayer” and “Ohio” that I DIDN’T like as much and made a record out of that.  (And I liked the majority of those two records.)  Plus, I just feel like they tried too hard to be “cute” or “clever” on some of the lyrics and it just fell apart for me on that level.

Ineligible Releases:

• Rush – Time Machine Tour
  Always good to hear from Rush, and it’s a fun release, but live records are ineligible.
• Wanda Jackson – The Party Ain’t Over
  LOVED this release…but there’s no material written just for the record on it.  Just covers…and that’s ineligible too.
• Ray Davies – See My Friends
  I love Ray Davies, and I love every song on this record.  But I can’t allow a covers record and I can’t allow a tribute record…and this is somehow both and neither and also a dude just playing his old songs…and I LOVE it, but it’s too confusing to make the top 10, ha ha.   (Seriously though…buy it.)

Other Stuff I Liked:

• Steve Martin – Rare Bird Alert
  Yes, it’s that Steve Martin…and it’s a bluegrass record.  It’s not top 10 good, but it’s good.
• Anthrax – Worship Music
  A respectable return for Joey Belladonna.  I’m a little tired of the Satan lovin’…but it’s a good record.
• Chickenfoot – Chickenfoot III
  Lots of fun, but just not quite top 10 material…but Sammy’s in the best form he’s been in a long time on this record, and if you’re a fan of the Red Rocker, you should check it out.
• Dropkick Murphys – Going Out in Style
  GREAT release.  Best one since “Sing Loud, Sing Proud.”  And I might regret not giving it more attention down the road…but for now, it’s great, but there was just other stuff that was greater.
• Iron & Wine – Kiss Each Other Clean
  It’s fine, and I like it a lot…but I kept forgetting that it came out this year, and that tells you all you need to know about why it didn’t make the top 10.
• Mr. Big – What If?
  Eric Martin kinda seemed to phone in the lyric writing…but the performances were strong.

Stuff I’m Completely Overlooking—and this post is too damn long anyway!:

• Mastodon
• Social Distortion
• Tori Amos
• Pearl Jam
• Hugh Laurie
• Devin Townsend
• Alice Cooper
• Hank III

…and that was 2011.  So…whatcha’ got 2012?  Pressure’s on!

A few years ago (I’ve lost count of how many, I’m afraid), my friend Paul died from Hodgkin’s Disease on Christmas Eve.  Paul was the bass player of a band I loved called Potter’s House.  He played bass and harmonica like his life depended on it.  He was kind enough to always let me play his bass for a while when I saw him—and at one gig (a New Year’s gig), I played a bluesy thing and he played harmonica on top of it.  It was a lot of fun, and a great memory.  The last time I saw Paul was at some Christian teen-convention that I was attending and he was playing at.  At that time, he was already sick, but I’m not sure if anyone including him knew how sick—and he didn’t mention it to me at the time; I didn’t know that until later.  He was very kind to me, joked around a little bit, and gave me his phone number, telling me to call him so we could hang out.  And I didn’t, because I was nervous about calling a cool, kind, wonderful person that I looked up to and respected.  And I still have that piece of paper with his phone number on it.  One of my great regrets.

Years later, while I was working at SLCC, a girl wandered into the Library and told me her name.  I recognized the last name immediately and asked if she was Paul’s sister.  Of course she was.  Why wouldn’t she be?  Funny how life provides resolution sometimes.  During the time I was there, I was able to give Helen a copy of “Potter’s House: Live,” a more-or-less bootleg tape they’d recorded and sold at gigs.  Somehow, she didn’t have a copy before then.  I got to give her something that had her brother playing bass and harmonica on it.  And that was kind of awesome.  Helen and I are still friends, and even this past week when she changed her Facebook profile pic, I commented, “Woah.  From the thumbnail, I thought you were a young Audrey Hepburn.”  (Which was meant as a compliment, of course…but it’s not like that—she’s married to a good guy and also way too young for me.)

So anyway…here’s the part where it gets a little sad and a little sweet.

Paul — I still miss you.  I think about you every time I plug in a bass, and I’m still working on trying to copy your tone.  I think I got closer to it this year.  Thank you for being who you were—who you are.  Thank you for making an awkward, geeky teenager feel like he was cool every time you saw him.  And someday, when you see me headed up there, get your harmonica ready.  We’ll need to jam.  And this time I’m DEFINITELY going to get in touch.  Merry Christmas, Paul.  Helen has turned out awesome, by the way.  You’d be proud of her.

————

Okay!  Now let’s all go Christmas our asses off!